The Do's and Don'ts of Dementia (Guest Post)

Everybody will meet dementia. As the number of people with this condition grows, so does our likelihood of encountering dementia behaviors everyday. 

We will see them in our loved ones, our friends, our neighbors, our colleagues. We will encounter them in the workplace, on vacation and online.

That is why it is more important than ever for people (not just caregivers) to recognize the signs of dementia, and to know the do's and don'ts of communicating with someone who is affected. 

Today's guest post takes us over a few

 reminders of why we may meet with outbursts from those with dementia, and how we can handle the situation in a dignified, humane manner. 

The Do's and Don'ts of Dementia 

Dementia can be very difficult for patients and their families to deal with. Symptoms such as anger, sadness, confusion, and fear can overtake a loved one with dementia in the blink of an eye. The more you familiarize yourself with the disease and it's symptoms, the better equipped you are to deal with these kinds of outbursts from a loved one who may have dementia.

 Below we'll discuss some of the major outbursts someone with dementia might experience, and how to properly handle them. Learn more about the do's and don'ts of dementia to make your time with your loved one as special as it has always been.

Physical or Verbal Aggression

Often, when a dementia patient becomes overwhelmed or frustrated with a task, they break down and become very angry, very quickly. This can cause them to become physically or verbally violent towards you. They may hit, kick, bite, or curse in an attempt to ward you off. It is important to remember that this is not truly how they feel towards you, but rather a way for them to express their frustration of feeling helpless or afraid. In order to end the violent reaction, it is important to identify what caused them to become angry in the first place.

• DO identify the problem in a calm and reassuring manner. Then try to drive their focus onto another task.

• DON'T further the argument or get frustrated and lash back. This will only worsen their reaction and further their aggressive behavior.

Confusion

Another symptom of dementia is confusion. Most often, dementia patients are confused about doctor's visits, or why they are not living in their own home. This confusion can then lead to an angry outburst.

• DO gently remind your loved one of their whereabouts. Use a simple explanation, then move on to another discussion or task.

• DON'T get into a long, drawn out explanation. This will only create more confusion and further upset your loved one.

Poor Judgment 

Wrongfully accusing someone of something or having trouble with finances are a common difficulty dementia patients experience. This is due to the deterioration of brain cells, which causes errors in ways of thinking.

• DO encourage and reassure your loved one that you are helping to take care of the problem. Be as encouraging and reassuring as you can, and enlist the help of others to help handle the problem if necessary.

• DON'T get frustrated and question your loved one's ability to deal with their personal business. They are having a hard enough time as it is, and you would only be adding to their difficulty by getting angry.

In general, you always want to speak to your loved ones reassuringly, confidently, and lovingly. If you need to explain something, keep it as short as possible so that they can understand. Try to use visual aids when you can, and speak slowly and clearly at all times. Always remember to be realistic in your expectations.

You never want to talk to your loved one in a harsh to demeaning tone. Avoid using complicated words or phrases and talking too fast. You should never attempt to communicate with a dementia patient when they are in a distracting environment, or invade their personal space if they begin to feel uncomfortable during any point of the conversation.

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Byline: Ruth Folger Weiss is a blogger for Regal Healthcare Residence, a nursing home in Lampasas, TX.