Caregiver Moment Humor

3 Ways That the Elderly Can Make Money Online

More and more seniors are taking the plunge and becoming tech-savvy. In fact, many of them have found ways to turn their computers into lucrative businesses.



And why not? Today's seniors have witnessed some of history's most amazing technological advances. They've seen cars go from being functional machines to being rolling computer systems they can operate by voice command.  They've seen 8-track players turn into MP3 players, black and white televisions turn into digital monsters, and basic kitchen gadgets that suddenly need to be programmed.



So why would we think they couldn't adjust to computers and the internet as well?

More Time More Opportunity

Computers offer the elderly a way to communicate with distant loved ones and friends. They can find entertainment, companionship and information. With less time constraints, seniors can actually dedicate themselves more to learning about computers.



For those who are pretty much homebound, the internet can be a lifeline to the world. But it is for so much more than just connecting with old friends or melting the brain with endless games.



The elderly have a lifetime of skills and experience to share. And there is a high demand for their knowledge and abilities. Here are just 3 ways in which the elderly can share what they have to offer, while making a little extra cash:

Writing Online for Income

Whether they have advice, tutorials, opinions, or just really great stories to tell, there are many outlets online for elders who can turn a good phrase. They can write for their own blog, or use self-publishing sites such as Hubpages and Bubblews.



If they have experience or education with market value (i.e. investment, accounting, healthcare, teaching, etc.) then they might find their niche working at microtasks on places such as Fiverr. Plus, there are always writing contests and magazines looking for great writers.



Maybe they would prefer writing reviews. There are many places that pay for reviews, either with cash or with coupons or incentives such as free samples.


Lastly, the elderly are brimming with interesting stories and life experiences. Do they have a story about overcoming hardships, dealing with issues such as caring for a spouse with Alzheimer's, traveling the world after retirement? If so, maybe they could publish a book, and share their knowledge and experiences with others.

Selling Stock Photos Online

Images are incredibly important to the online world. Everyone needs quality photos to use for online blogs and articles. Those photos have to come from somewhere. If your loved one likes to use a camera, then they might have a lot of fun creating and selling stock photos online.



This hobby can be a bit more expensive, requiring an investment in a good digital camera and some knowledge of photo editing programs. However, once they are set up, there is no more overhead, since digital photos don't require the cost of development. In fact, they can take and download thousands of photos to a computer.



Some sites that buy stock photos include:

• Fotolia
• Dreamstime
• Shutterstock

Payment, as with article writing, varies depending on site policy, and what type of license the photographer chooses. Some sites pay more per sold photo if you are a paid member of the site. Everytime someone purchases a photo, you receive a royalty, which means that photos submitted years ago can still draw passive income.



You can help your loved one get started by suggesting a few subjects that people need or love to see in images:

• Nature shots (birds, sunsets, butterflies, flowers, trees, storms, rivers, etc.) 
• People
• Animals 

Sometimes it can be hard for writers, blog owners, websites, and artists to find good stock photos of  objects or scenes that are more difficult to find.  If they don't have a way to take their own photos, then they buy a stock photo that matches what they are writing. Some subjects that are covered may include:

• Health (pills, medical equipment, hospitals, ambulances, medical professionals, fitness equipment, etc.)
• Homes and neighborhoods (for real estate or home DIY blogs/articles)
• Food and cooking supplies
• Events
• Electronics

A little set-up goes a long way toward successful photo sales, so if your loved one is really interested in this hobby, you might help them find great online tutorials for creating quality photos, and how to use everyday items as photo props.



This is also a great opportunity for socialization, they may get some wonderful photo opportunities from attending events such as dances, parties, socials, church bazaars, etc.



If you want to skip selling via a stock photo company, sites such as FineArtAmerica provide a service where photographers and artists can sell prints of their works. Membership is free, and photos can be sold on a variety of items as well as on prints.

Selling Arts and Crafts Online

Not writing or photography? How about arts and crafts? If your loved one enjoys making things with his or her hands, and is capable of doing so, then they can still make money online!



Etsy is a huge site where  people can sell handcrafted goods. These can range from crocheted hats to hand-stamped invitations, from wooden birdhouses to baby quilts.



This can be a terrific solution for the person who is unable to set up and sell their crafts at booths and bazaars. It does require some overhead and ongoing expense though, so if your loved one is unable to get out much on their own, make sure you are available to help them shop for supplies and make trips to the post office.



For those who are more into art than crafts, there are places to sell digital scans of artwork as prints. FineArtAmerica is an excellent place for those who enjoy creating classy pieces of art in traditional mediums. Zazzle is a an option for those who have a little tech savvy and would love to see their art appear on calendars, coffee mugs, etc.

Help The Elderly Help Themselves

Many seniors, especially those that have to be cared for by their families, can become depressed if they feel like they are losing both their independence and their sense of purpose. Some may be okay with hobbies, but others may want to still feel as though they are contributing to society or to the family income.



Although no one gets rich overnight online, with time and dedication, anyone can build up a nice income while at the same time enjoying the social aspect of online business. Even if nothing more than a few pennies is earned, the opportunities to meet new friends is limitless. 

5 Pets That Are Inappropriate for the Elderly

Some Pets Are Beneficial to the Elderly

Pets are for more than just enjoyment. People who own a dog, cat or other animal friend show marked improvement in their health. Lower cholesterol, improved blood pressure, less incidences of depression; these are just a few of the ways that pets cam make you healthy.

The elderly, maybe more than anyone else, can benefit from the companionship of animals. Many family members know this, and they generously set up their elderly loved one with a pet. Unfortunately, they don't always use common sense.

• Is the pet expensive to feed?
• Is the pet prone to illness?
• Does the pet require a special set-up?
• How often will it need vet care?
• Is this animal small enough to be handled easily?
• Is this pet capable of tripping, biting or otherwise injuring an elder?

Its okay to want to be helpful, but you do have to take into consideration the health and capabilities of your loved one BEFORE you purchase or adopt a pet for them. Sure, some elders can handle a variety of pets of different sizes, but the people who benefit the MOST from a pet are lonely shut-ins or those who can no longer be as active as they once were.

When this is the case, pets should be low-maintenance. Here are some pretty inappropriate pets I have seen gifted to the elderly, and why they might not be the best choice for your loved one:

Potbelly Pig

Delores' daughter was sure that her mother would love this cute, cuddly piglet. And she was right. But piglets grow into pigs. It was very hard for Delores to care for an animal that needed lots of outside time. Plus, the pig was destructive, as pigs tend to be.

Potbelly pigs may be smaller than their hog cousins, but they are still quite large when fully grown, and after escaping one day, this pig did some expensive damage to the neighbor's yard. This led to a huge dispute which cost Delores quite a bit of money.

Large Fish

Beautiful and soothing, fish can be the perfect pet for the elderly. They don't need to be walked or groomed, and if they die, they are easily replaced. However, someone has to heft those fish tanks every now and then to clean them.

Setting their parents up with the 50 gallon pedestal fish tank with the huge tropical fish was a great idea. But Hank and Nettie's kids didn't bother to come over and help with tank up-keep. Hank decided he would do it himself, and ended up with broken tank, dead fish and a serious cut that required stitches.

Snake

Jack was 91 and could still drive, but didn't like getting out more often than necessary. Always an animal lover, it only took a few tears from his 7 year old grandson for Jack to agree to adopt the boy's pet snake. After the snake earned an eviction notice for eating a pet parakeet at home.

Not only are snakes expensive to maintain, with special set-ups and lights, but they aren't the easiest to feed either. Living nearly a hundred miles from a place where he could purchase feeder mice, Jack had to make long trips too often to stock up on snake food. Then he bought in bulk, and had to spend even more to be able to keep the mice.

Owning the snake put quite a dent in his budget and didn't do much for his social life either. Most of his friends refused to come by now that he had "that snake" in the living room!

His and Her Dogs

Such a cute idea. Hannah and Ray had recently lost their 20 year old dog, and were devastated. To cheer them up over their loss, their son and daughter-in-law brought them his and her dogs. For him, a St Bernard (a  manly dog) and for her, a terrier cross that was lap-sized. (dainty!)

This might have worked, except that Hannah was wheelchair bound, meaning that she couldn't help train or care for the dogs. Then the small dog became attached to Ray, and the larger dog was attached to no one. Unable to train either dog well, thanks to his own physical limitations, Ray soon became a victim of "wrong place, wrong time". The two dogs got into a fight, and when trying to save the smaller dog, Ray became tangled in both animals, fell, and suffered a broken hip.

{Author's Note: Both dogs and cats make excellent elder companions. However, they should already have some training and be calm enough to not cause injuries.}

Chickens

Vera really thought that buying her elderly mom six chickens was a great idea. Not only would mom have something to care for, she would have free food. Except, eggs aren't free, even when you own the chicken.

As Vera soon learned, chickens also need a coop, feed, water, medicine, bedding, roost poles and a variety of other creature comforts. Oh, and sometimes you have to pay for a permit to keep them inside city limits. Ouch.

Not only was this costly, but Vera's mom couldn't go outside on certain days to care for the chickens. So, guess who had to do the job?

Think Before You Buy

Yes, animals are great for the elderly. However, not all animals are perfect.

And of course, the advice here is non-applicable to seniors who are fond of the animals listed and  prefer them to other pets. Use common sense when choosing a pet for your loved one.

And please, ask them first whether or not they would like one before you surprise them!

Happy Valentine's Day From Elder Care Issues

Today is all about love. But not necessarily the romantic kind. Don't forget to show some affection to elders and their caregivers today.

Beyond Valentine's Day--Romance For Seniors

Do the elderly still fall in love? Do they want to date? Here are some real stories from caregivers who have discovered the answers in a surprising way: 


If you recently helped your mom or dad learn how to use a computer, you may think that they are using it solely for keeping in touch with you and those in their social circle. That's what Debbie, a neighbor, thought too.


"I finally talked my dad into a computer. He seemed so lonely, and I thought it would be a great way for him to talk to all the grandkids. Plus, he could find old buddies and chat with his Sunday school group. My understanding was that it was all about nostalgia..." 


In a way, it was about nostalgia. Debbie's dad, a widower of 8 years, was pining for the days when he was an eligible bachelor who courted bevvies of pretty ladies.


"One day, he couldn't even grasp the concept of email. A month later, he had FOUR profiles set up on dating sites and was going out almost every night with a different girlfriend!"  


He isn't the only one. Thousands of people age 50 and up are taking advantage of the internet to find love. Some are looking for life-partners. Others are looking for a good time.



Cammie, a nurse at a local nursing home, was surprised when a newly admitted gentleman resident recognized her and called her by name.


" I know you. You are Margaret's daughter!" 


Puzzled, Cammie asked how the man knew her mother. Surprise was not her reaction when she learned that her mother and this gentleman had been seeing each other casually for several months.


"I called my mother, who is 89, and demanded to know what was going on. She admitted that for the past two years she and her friend Lora had been using dating sites. " 


What was more shocking to Cammie, was that her mother's dates had often been invited to stay the night.


"You just don't want to think about your 89 year old mother having one-night stands." Cammie said. "




Thanks to seniors hitting the dating scene, there has been a major role-reversal between them and and their children. Gary, a part-time caregiver for his elderly mother, was bewildered when an online dating site led his mom to a full-time boyfriend.



"I caught myself telling them to be home by a certain time, asked her for the number of the place they would be eating...all those embarrassing things that my parents used to do to me and my sisters! And yes, when they weren't back by midnight, I thought about calling the cops or going out looking for them."


Despite the fact that their kids are worried sick about this new dating trend, seniors are enjoying their freedom. And not all kids are shocked or worried. Some, like Debbie, are happy.



"Being in love makes you feel good. A year ago, Dad was ready to give up. He didn't go out, he didn't care about his health or appearance. Now, he takes his medication, follows doctor's orders, exercises, and  gets out of the house more than I do! I think the online dating sites did me a huge favor. They gave me my dad for a few more years." 



Dating sites may not always be life-savers. But this Valentine's Day, thousands of seniors who would have been forgotten and lonely are now getting flowers and romantic cards from their secret, and not-so-secret, admirers. So, even though the commercials for all those dating sites may be incredibly annoying, they are actually serving a good purpose when it comes to the elderly community.



Of course, not all seniors will be willing to jump online and hook up a date for tonight. If you know an elderly shut-in, or just someone who may need some cheering up, take a few minutes to deliver a Valentine today.

5 Benefits of Meditation For Those With Dementia

What If You Could Magically Slow Dementia?

How would you feel if you found an easy way to halt the progression of dementia in your loved one? How would you feel if this were something that was painless and easy to do from the comfort of home?

That solution could be as easy as 20 minutes of mindful meditation every day. Meditation is often recommended for caregivers as a way of relieving stress, but UCLA researchers think there could be more benefits, such as reducing the inflammatory process which can lead to Alzheimer's.

Another study revealed that daily meditation could alter the parts of the brain that are related to memory and self-awareness, possibly even restoring some of the brain's natural plasticity. That is great news for the elderly and their caregivers alike.

Bonus Reasons to Meditate

So what are 5 other benefits of meditation that can help the elderly? Only 5? There are probably close to a 100 benefits, but these are the ones that are the most important.

1. Improves Self-Control 

As dementia progresses, the elderly find it difficult to contain their emotions. In early stages they may be frustrated, angry, and depressed about their diagnosis. Meditation can help cope with the stress from this emotional turmoil, and allow the elder to express themselves in a more appropriate and productive manner.

2. It Can Relieve Pain

Meditation alters the way the brain reads signals, especially sensory signals. Whereas it doesn't make pain go away, it changes how the person perceives and reacts to pain, anxiety about pain, and stress from pain. 

3. Increases Creativity

This may not seem like something important to caregivers or the elderly, however creativity is about more than just creating art or tall-tales. Creative thinking is also a way to solve problems. And caregiving comes with a lot of problems, for all parties. 

Because every case is  unique, there may not be professional solutions for every issue that arises, but increasing creative thinking could help the elderly cope better with their individual situations and their caregivers to find effective solutions that are beneficial to everyone. 

4. Improves Cognition

Alzheimer's and dementia affect more than "just memories". They affect cognition, which means they affect the person's ability to take in information, process it, recognize it and utilize it at a later date. As dementia progresses, a person loses their ability to effectively communicate what they see, hear, feel and think: simply because they do not have the words to apply to these concepts. 

(Ex. a person's food is cold. They may be unhappy, but they can't tell you why they are unhappy, because they cannot remember the word for "cold". Later, they may not be able to remember the difference between hot and cold, just that too much one way or the other causes them discomfort.)

Meditation has been shown (via brain scans) to increase grey matter in the brain. There was also evidence of increased activity in the areas related to memory and focus. 

5. Promotes Compassion

Compassion? Empathy? These may not sound like they would benefit anyone with dementia. However, how a person behaves often results in how well they are cared for. When people become sick, they often take out their frustration and grief on those who are closest to them. 

Eventually, that can lead to caregivers who withdraw emotionally, and tend only to see to basic needs. This is a bad situation for all involved. Meditation can actually improve empathy and caring, which is why it is helpful for both the elderly and their caregivers to practice meditation. When both parties can express empathy for each other, the caregiver relationship is strengthened and a healthier atmosphere is created. 

Share the Moment

Who has time to meditate? You do. It doesn't have to be an hour long session. It doesn't require setting up any type of fancy equipment. It just takes practice and a dedicated schedule.

 Ideally, the best time to meditate is when the person with dementia is at their best. As their caregiver, you know when they are most lucid and most cooperative. Set aside 10-30 minutes during that time of the day, remove all distractions and sit with your love done for a session of meditation. 

Here is a great place to get started for learning meditation techniques: 

Arts and Crafts for the Elderly--How to Turn Hoarding into Crafting

source freedigitalphotos.net

What is all This Trash?

20,000 plastic bags. A hundred balls of aluminum foil. Gift wrap saved for decades. Stacks of empty bowls, jars and other containers.

This is what you may see in the home of an elderly hoarder. Hoarding is a complex psychological condition, and I'm not going to go into detail about the many stages and levels here. I will however, break down the simple kinds of hoarding so frequently seen in the elderly.

I've rarely visited the home of an older person and not found some strange items hidden back. For the most part, the reasons for saving "stuff" fell under these three categories:

• If I throw it away, I might need it later. 
• Throwing it away is a waste of money.
• I can't throw it away, so-and-so gave it to me. 

All are valid reasons, to a degree. That is what makes it hard for caregivers to step in and start throwing accumulated junk away. Especially when it causes their loved one distress. Still, when it comes time to move that loved one from their own home to either their caregivers home or to a LTC facility, facing down the mess is inevitable. 

How to Clean Up Without a Fight

Luckily, there are some easy ways to tackle hoarding. It does take patience, empathy, and compromise though. When we cleaned up my grandmother's possessions, we faced the devastating task of sorting through a lifetime worth of hoarded items. 

Hoarding does have its dangers. There was food with expiration dates ten years old. There were closets full of clothes and linens infested with mildew. There was evidence of mice in forgotten boxes and drawers. Therefore, on certain items, we just had to stand firm and say "This is trash. It is dangerous."

However, if it wasn't unhealthy, we packed it up and moved it to storage. Storage is a great solution because that means the stuff isn't "gone". It is still there, and can be used if it is "needed". This calmed down the distress over waste too. 

Well, that was easy enough with knick-knacks, furniture, and enough kitchen ware for forty families that had accumulated under the guest bed. But what about the bags, boxes, bows, gift wrap, sewing materials, and other items? 

Compromise has its limits and we weren't going to pack boxes full of Walmart bags for storage. So...what can you do with all that stuff? 

Get Creative, Get Crafty

Boredom is a major complaint among the elderly who can no longer live independently. When it isn't safe for them to do the tasks they enjoy or simply did everyday, they can become morose and even depressed. 

Turning all that trash into craft projects took care of two issues at the same time. By coming up with some easy-to-do craft projects, we repurposed tons of what was basically garbage. Plus, my grandmother didn't feel anxious about losing these items, because they were being "put to good use". Meaning we were making useful items from them. And of course, crafting is a good way to pass time and still be productive, something that many elders worry about. 

Here are some of the ways we upcycled hoarded items into useful craft projects: 

Clothes 

For some reason,  my grandmother had sacks and sacks of clothes that were several sizes too big for her. We carefully cut these down for sewing projects. She can no longer sew herself, but she was willing to do the prep work and give advice on the finished projects. 

• potholders
• draft stoppers
• bean bags
• rice bags
• lap quilts
• pillows

Plastic Bags

We discreetly threw away any soiled bags or food wrappers that had been saved. Shopping bags were cut into strips which she could braid. Once they were braided, they could be sewn into doilies, mats, and rugs. 

Bags are also great stuffing for draft stoppers and pet beds. (my cat loves the crinkly texture.) We used numerous bags to stuff Halloween scarecrows and pumpkin bags too. Later, they could be thrown away without anyone noticing.

Mismatched Kitchen Items

These quickly became garden decor or storage containers. Odd flatware makes cool windchimes, jars can be made into solar lights, pots and kettles make great flower planters.

Paper and Cardboard

Although there isn't much you can do with Christmas bows that have been squashed for eons, gift paper can be turned into holiday collages. Gift bags can be cut down and and used as matting behind photos, as framed holiday art, or as decoupage material. 

Cardboard containers (53 oatmeal canisters!) can be covered in paper or painted to make caddies and organizers. They also turn into great holiday decorations with a little love. Thanks to spray can triggers, even someone with arthritis can help paint. 

Creative Fibbing and Relocation

Sometimes it is hard to find a solution. No one could think of a good way to use the hundreds of butter and Cool Whip bowls. A few yes, but hundreds? Rather than just saying "Hey, we are pitching these." we had people come in and say they really needed them for some project or another. 

This might not work with some people, but my grandmother was okay with the items going to new homes. She just didn't want them wasted. Many items DID get thrown away, but she never knew. Personally, I think this is an ideal solution, because no one gets upset. It just takes a little work. 

Then there was the issue of freezer bags and shoe boxes filled with odds and ends. Once the odds and ends were sorted, there was a reluctance to let the bags and boxes go, even though they were filthy and tattered. Replacing them with dollar store baskets and plastic containers turned out to be a great solution. Mostly because of the psychological impact. We had spent money on the new containers, therefore it would be a bigger waste not to use them. Plus, they protected the contents better. 

Like I said, these solutions may not work for everyone. Different individuals have their own reasons for hoarding, and it can be very difficult for caregivers to negotiate. If your elderly loved one refuses help, or becomes overly distressed, it may be time to speak with a doctor. 

Tips: 

• Don't turn crafting into a chore in order to get the stuff out of the way. Keep the supplies on hand and so that projects can be worked on at leisure. 

• Take time to sit down and craft along with your loved one. 

• Any projects that can't be used can be donated to those in need. Help your loved one make gift baskets and deliver them to homes or churches. 

• Always supervise the use of scissor or sharp tools in the hands of those with dementia, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's or vision disorders. 

• Try keeping  a table near a well-lit window so that your loved one has a relaxing place to work, and where their materials won't be disturbed. 

10 Interesting Facts About Senior Citizens

What do you really know about the elderly? How would you describe them as a group? What about as individuals?

I asked several random people who were not in direct contact with a senior citizen on a daily basis to answer those questions. Here are few of the responses that I received:

• The elderly are frail. 
• The elderly seem lonely. 
• Older people are sad. 
• Older people live in the past.
• Elderly people have it easy because they get stuff for free. 
• Older people don't like younger people. 
• Elderly people don't have fun anymore.
• They are sick. 

Those opinions paint a rather bleak picture of aging. Well, I'm not here to claim that any of those observations are myths, because sometimes they are true. Instead, I am going to give you 10 facts about senior citizens that even caregivers might not know.

Running Very Fast With the Elderly

Let's Go Very Fast...

" I wish I could go outside. I would love to go very fast down that hill in this wheelchair." Marjorie lamented. As per her daily routine, she was gazing out the door after lunch at the grassy slope in front of the nursing home. 

"That may be why they don't let you out!" I laughed. "There is a highway at the bottom of that slope. And the cars are driving pretty fast." 

"Faster than me, that's for sure." 

It was a daily exchange, and both she and I knew that the facility was never going to allow her to go speeding off into a busy highway. In the months I had worked with and for Marj, I had learned that she used to be hell-on-wheels, back when her wheels numbered four, and were backed by a lot of horsepower. 

"Yeah...I reckon the cops in this town are glad I'm in here now. I used to give them hell. I bet I've paid thousands of dollars in speeding tickets over the years. Back when I had my red Pontiac. I never minded paying though. I had my fun, and they always wore new uniforms. " she chuckled. "I was doing a civic duty actually." 

Her chuckle was filled with a tinge of sadness. There were no thrills in here, unless you were the type of person to go into ecstasies over mealtimes or weekly Bingo games. Marjorie wasn't that type of person. 

Memories and Pontiacs

An 8x10 photograph in her room showed yesterday's Marjorie. Taken twenty years ago, it showed a woman who was in her seventies. She was seated on the hood of a red Pontiac, smoking a cigarette.

She wore enormous sunglasses, and her clothes were a mix-n-match of the colorful 80's and the past decades. Clearly, she was a lady who fell in love with life every year--from her brilliantly dyed, red bouffant hair-do to the stone-washed jeans.

At 94, she still smoked, but not the 4 packs a day she preferred. When I would take her to the courtyard for a smoke, she would tell stories about her car, a gift from her third husband. She talked about her first airplane trip to Mexico, her son who died years ago in a car crash, and her grandson who placed her here because he couldn't move from Alberta to care for her after the dementia diagnosis.

These things she could remember because they were yesterday. She had trouble sometimes remembering where she was today. But she fought the dementia like a pro, and for the most part, she was lucid.

After lunch though, as the day started winding down towards evening, she would get restless. That's when she was most likely to be confused, (did I just eat?) and most likely to beg to go outside and race down the slope.

Small Compromises and White Lies

"You there...c'mere a minute." Marjorie beckoned me over to the door. It was autumn...the sun was low in the sky and a the dying grass outside was golden. "You aren't allowed to push me down that hill, are you?"

"No ma'am. There is a road down there, and you could be hurt."

"How fast can you push this chair...down the hallway, then?"

"Ah...I don't think we are allowed to do that either."

"I HAVE TO GO THE BATHROOM! RIGHT NOW! HURRY, HURRY!" Marjorie gripped the wheelchair arms with one hand, and her squeezed her knees together.

It was so out-of-character for her that I was startled. Was this a new dementia behavior?

"Well?" she hissed. "What are you waiting for? Go very fast! BEFORE I WET MYSELF!!"

Dementia or no, Marjorie had discovered a way to go fast. She hunkered down, and I said a small prayer of thanks that she only weighed 100 pounds fully dressed. The charge nurse didn't even look up as we flew past the nurse's station.

I ran as fast as I could down the hall, and Marjorie laughed. I was never so glad that her room was near the far end. My sneakers squeaked on the waxed tile as we dodged Mr. Kemp and his walker. He threw some curses at us as we passed by.

I didn't even slow down to turn in the door. We took it on one wheel.

Safely in her room, she slapped the wheelchair with glee. "Not quite as fast as the old days, but it beats creeping like a snail all the time."

"So, do you need to use the bathroom?" I asked, panting slightly.

"Hell no."she winked. "When I do...I'll let you know. "

For the next few weeks, this was Marjorie's favorite game. At first, the other aides and nurses were puzzled by her new outbursts. Then they just grumbled in annoyance.

"She doesn't even need to go when we get there. Maybe it is just attention-seeking. "

Because it was harmless, no one complained to the nurses, and the nurses never called the doctor. It had become one of Marjorie's "quirks". Did any of them understand her need for speed?

As Fast as The Wind, Okay? 

Marjorie began to feel sick near the end of October. While being transferred to the whirlpool tub, she had stumbled a bit and cut her hip on the corner of the towel rack. In spite of being treated both topically and with antibiotics, the wound refused to heal. Infection set in.

I suspected that the end was near one Sunday, when Marjorie had cunningly arranged for the longest trip she could possible make inside the nursing home. While we were busy helping people away from their finished lunches, she had wheeled herself (much more slowly than usual) to the far end of the opposite hall. Soon, she began hollering out her need to go the bathroom.

One of the aides threw up her hands and laughed. "Don't look at me. She's your hall! Besides, I HAVE to see that Ms. Leon gets a shower today sometime. "

When I reached Marjorie, she was ready. "Let's go fast!" she urged.

To me, the hallway looked twelve miles long, but I rolled the chair back and forth to pick up some momentum. I realized it was a lot lighter these days. Summoning up energy I really needed to save for the rest of the shift, I started running.

We sped into the common area, and the nurse looked up from her desk. "Go Marjorie, GO!" she cheered! "You are flying, lady!"

On  her own hall though, Marjorie signaled me with a wave. "Slow down, just a bit..."

"Okay. You all right?"

"I am. Don't stop, just don't go so fast. I don't want to get to the end that quickly."

We fell back into the equivalent of cruise control for the rest of the journey. After we arrived in her room, she wanted to lie down. An hour or so later, her call bell sounded in the otherwise quiet hall. Marjorie rarely, if ever, used her call bell. The nurse glanced at the board.

"I'll go." she said, quietly.

Before long, the ambulance zoomed up the drive and stopped near the entrance. The red lights flashed across the faces of confused and curious residents.

"Am I sick again?" asked Ms. Leon, twisting her hands in agitation.

"No, honey. You are just fine." we reassured her.

They wheeled Marjorie down the hall on the stretcher. Her small body was engulfed by straps and blankets and the tubing for the oxygen. She lifted a hand slightly at us as she passed by. The nurse held the door open, and as Marjorie exited the nursing home for the last time, she pushed the mask aside and said:

"Now, when we go down that hill, let's go as fast as the wind, okay?"

The nurse caught one of the paramedics by the sleeve and whispered something to him. He gave a slight nod of acknowledgment. The ambulance shot out of the narrow, circle drive, blasted  the sirens, and disappeared in a blur of red lights. Was that the slight sound of squalling tires we heard as they made the turn onto the highway?

It wasn't a red Pontiac, but it could go very fast. It could go as fast as the wind.

Must-Haves For Caregivers

What tools do caregivers need?

If you take care of an aging relative, you really should have a caregiving survival kit composed of important caregiver must-haves.  If you own a home, you probably have a basic toolkit so that you can keep up with accidents and repairs.

If you have a car, you probably keep a few tools onboard so that you can change a tire, check your tire pressure, etc. And of course, if you have children, you probably have  a variety of kits to handle anything from boredom to bleeding.

So Why Don't You Have a Caregiving Kit?

Google some advice on all the stuff you will need to care for an elderly loved one, and you will be just as overwhelmed as new parents. From your own personal therapist to digital pill boxes, its amazing what items are often considered necessities.

It isn't really that complex though, so don't worry. You can survive with a minimum of tools. Some necessities are things you can't even touch!

1. A Cellphone

Bah! We lived for years without cellphones, you might say. Well, that's true. But some people didn't live. Some people died because help could not be reached immediately. A cellphone allows a caregiver to:

• Call EMS whenever and wherever needed
• Keep in touch with other concerned family and friends
• Organize appointments
• Quickly access the internet if for information
• Text discreet updates to family members (important in a crowded hospital waiting room) 
• Set alarms for medications or treatments so that they are never late.
• Take and store notes about issues that need to be brought to a doctor's attention
• Store an updated list of medications, dates, medical information, etc. 

2. CPR/First Aid Training

Even if you live next door to a hospital, the minutes you can save by knowing CPR and some basic first aid techniques could be what saves your loved one's life. Classes are offered locally even in rural areas, and are usually quite reasonable.

If you can't manage a certification class, you might be able to get help from a friend or acquaintance that has training. Even a few informal lessons are better than having no clue what to do in case of an emergency.

3. First Aid Kit

Even if your house is as well stocked as a pharmacy, you still need to keep a few emergency items in a small kit. This kit should be easily accessible in case of emergency. This is NOT where you keep your elder's daily medications. This is where you keep supplies such as:

• Gauze and bandages
• Peroxide
• Rubbing alcohol
• Antiobiotic cream
• Gloves
• Tweezers
• Small pair of scissors
• Benadryl
• Burn ointment
• Pain relief
• Hand Sanitizer
• Glucose

Basically, any items that you might need for an immediate emergency. These can be tailored to suit the individual needs of your loved one. Don't forget to tape a card to the box with basic information. 

4. Several Copies of Medical Information 

Keep a current list of: 

• Current medications (include dosage information and how often they are taken)
• Allergies
• Health conditions
• Important phone numbers

Laminate a copy to hang in the kitchen by the phone. Keep another copy in the car, your purse...wherever you are sure to have it when you need it. In case of an emergency transport it can be hard for anyone to remember all the medical information they will ask for. 

5. A Fire-Proof Safe

Caregiving comes with tons of paperwork. And much of it has important personal information included. Therefore, a safe is a necessity.

6. Organization

It doesn't have to be a stellar organizational system, but it does have to be functional. Your life as a caregiver will be a lot easier if your loved one's information, supplies, medications, etc, aren't scattered over several rooms.

Keep medications organized in a safe location out of reach of children and pets. Keep any information you have to use frequently in a file.

 If necessary, keep medical supplies in a cabinet near the area where you care for your loved one. And be sure to keep updated phone numbers and addresses on hand for all relatives and friends that need to be notified in case of an emergency.

Humor, Patience, and Support

Aside from the "tools" above, you may need many gadgets. It depends on your needs and those of your loved one. But, no matter what, you will need to keep a healthy supply of humor and patience on hand at all times.

Support is another must-have. Get it from friends, family, a counselor, a church group or an online community--but make sure you have enough of it to get you though the rainy days.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net