Recognition for Caregivers--National Caregiver Month!

Finally! Caregivers are Seen and Heard

Did you know that statistics are in, and the number of caregivers in the US is in the MILLIONS? That is millions of people, more people than could populate a large city. The 2012 census has Los Angeles with just over 3 million people. Caregiving sites estimate between 40 and 65 million caregivers! It is about time that a population that large is recognized for what they do. 

What Do Caregivers Do? 

Caregivers will tell you that they do it all! Or at least it feels that way sometimes. Every caregiver has a unique situation. There are those that care for an aging parent, those that care for two aging parents, those that care for parents in their own homes. 

They may be long-distance caregivers, they may care for a disabled spouse, child or sibling. Caregivers care for friends or distant relatives. They may may have to quit their jobs to provide round the clock supervision, or the may manage the care provided by a network of care professionals. 

Caregivers are responsible for the safety, health, well-being, finances, and legal aspects of another person, usually at the same time they care caring for their own homes, careers, families, children, education or health issues. 

Caregiver Health

Due to the overwhelming stress of caregiving and the often unreasonable expectations of society, those who care for a loved one often experience major health problems. From depression to hypertension, caregivers suffer (sometimes in silence) as they go through their daily routine. 

Still, this doesn't mean that caregivers regret their choices. Even when they doubt themselves, they know that they are doing what they think is best for their loved ones. 

Hug A Caregiver

The President declared November to be National Family Caregiver Month. A time to honor and support those who sacrifice so much for the benefit of others. Thanks to them, millions of people will better care and a better quality of life. 

If you know someone who is a caregiver, take a moment to send them a hug, a thanks, or just a smile. Ask if there is anything you can do for them. Their work often goes un-noticed and unpaid, and a simple thank you can mean the world. 

Also, read this article to learn the signs of caregiver burnout and tips for what you can do to help a caregiver who may be experiencing extreme stress: 

Caregiver Burnout 

25 Honest Ways To Tell You Are A Caregiver

image courtesy freedigitalphotos.net

Let's face it, being a caregiver isn't easy, is it? In fact, it pretty much sucks 98% of the time. That doesn't mean you don't care about your loved one, though. It just means that the job is hard, gross, frustrating, thankless, stressful, and heartbreaking. Just like your old job, except you don't get a paycheck or vacation days.


Part of the stress caregivers experience comes from social expectations. You are SUPPOSED to be "on top of it". You are SUPPOSED to sacrifice your time, health, sanity, family, and money. You are supposed to do it without complaint.


And you are NEVER allowed to make a mistake. Even if you didn't make a mistake--even if something totally out of your control happens, you are supposed to beg forgiveness for not preventing it, right?


All caregivers should  cut themselves a little slack. There are two things in life that you can never do 100% perfectly. One is parent your children, and the other is parent the elderly. There will be injuries, accidents, illnesses, mistakes, misjudgments and moments when you tear your hair out.



There will be moments when you want to tear THEIR hair out too. As long as you never intentionally cause your loved one physical harm, and you do your best, then you are a great caregiver.


So, take a little time, let your guilt slide off of your shoulders, and read about the 25 Ways to Tell You Are A Caregiver. And hey, you don't have to agree with all of these:

Halloween And The Elderly

source stuartmiles via freedigitalphotos.net

One of my favorite memories of working in Long Term Care happened at Halloween. For whatever reason, the facility had decided to really do something special for the holiday, not just cupcakes and punch as per the usual "special occasion".

The office staff and administrators, with the help of night shift had decorated the entire common area while the residents slept. The next morning, 31 elderly and developmentally disabled adults woke to find

The Garden Spider--Some Folklore From My Elders

When I was growing up, there were certain animals and bugs that we were allowed to kill. Venomous snakes and spiders were never well loved. And many spiders bit the dust just because they were "creepy" or looked too much like a venomous spider.

One spider that was fiercely protected though was this yellow and black garden spider. KNown properly by the name of Argiope,  the elderly ladies in my life called them Writing Spiders, Garden Spiders, or Name Spiders.

If you don't like spiders, then this one is definitely a yucky looking specimen to have around. It is large...sometimes seven inches across! It builds enormous webs that you don't want to walk into. But it also has magical powers. And in the Ouachita Mountains...you respect things with magical powers.

From a very young age, my grandmother taught us that you NEVER kill or even bother a writing spider. If you tear down it's web, or try to kill it...it will rebuild the next day. And it will write your name in it's web. When that happens...you are doomed to die.

If you kill it, then you have doomed yourself to bad luck. The worst kind of bad luck, like disease, grief and yes...even death. That is how powerful the magic of this spider is. Some other legends say that if the spiders hear you speak the name of a love one, or if they count a child's teeth, they will write those names in their webs too.

As a tribute to all the elderly people in my life who left these spiders looming in their gardens, and taught me to respect the power of Nature, here is a photo of my spider. She has been hanging on my porch for weeks, and everyone is forbidden to bother her web.

Bedroom Makeover For Elders

Are you planning on caring for an elderly loved one in your home? Have you already made the move? If so, how are the bedroom arrangements working out?


Many caregivers have to make the decision to move mom or dad into their home pretty quick. They usually don't take the time to remodel or redecorate a room. Instead, they tidy up the guest room and when their loved one arrives, they throw a few familiar knick-knacks or pictures up and call it home.

Give Your Loved One a Home, Not  Just a Room

The problem here is that it doesn't feel like home. It doesn't feel personal either. It FEELS like sleeping in someone's guest room, which can be uncomfortable for anyone. 

Can you relax in a hotel room as well as you relax at home? Probably not. Now imagine that you have memory loss and you keep waking up in a strange hotel room.


Even though it can be very beneficial for their peace-of-mind if mom or dad's new room has familiar items in it, that doesn't mean you have to completely replicate the look of their old bedroom. Instead, sort through their bedroom belongings and carefully curate special items. 


Choose items that have strong personal meaning and keep those. Don't keep ragged or stained bedding or moth-eaten curtains just because they are familiar. 


 Even those with Alzheimer's and dementia can adapt to new surroundings, but it can be a lot smoother if the room is still personalized. You might like the Pacific blue room with the seashells...but maybe mom wants dark pink with roses. Or maybe dad likes yellow plaid. 



As they lose their ability to communicate their wants and needs, those with cognitive loss are still comforted by colors they love the most. So let them pick their own palette, and then work the other items in accordingly. 



If they are able, why not take your loved one on a shopping trip? By listening to their desires for their environment (within reason, of course) you are respecting their independence. Ask for their opinion on:

• Paint samples

• Bedding sets

• Curtains

• Wall Art

• Storage solutions

Just remember, you can always re-paint walls later. In the meantime, if pink walls and red curtains make mom happy, then both she and her caregivers will be healthier and more relaxed. 

Rather than standing firm on paint colors, save your energy for safety issues. As the caregiver, it is your responsibility to say "No" to fall hazards such as rugs. 


When it comes to arranging furniture, there can be a reasonable amount of compromise. However, issues such as the placement of lamps should be your decision, so that there are no cords running across the floor. 


You should also have final say on: 

• Too much clutter. It collects dust, and can make it difficult for a person to find what they need. 

• Styles of furniture. You want something sturdy, in case your loved one uses it to steady themselves. It also needs to be functional, comfortable, safe,  and easy to clean. 

• Certain items that can irritate dementia: if your elder has dementia, then huge mirrors, shiny objects, small busy prints, things that make strange shadows, or perplexing knobs and switches can later becomes points of agitation. Think ahead, buy once. 

What if your loved one doesn't want anything special? 

This issue isn't mentioned much, but there are elderly persons who shrug off the idea of anything new. They may be very adamant about you "not spending money on them" or "not wasting time on them". You may hear things such as: 

• My old stuff is good enough for me. 

• I don't care what the walls look like. 

• I probably won't live long enough for it to matter anyway. 

• You are just going to put me in a nursing home in a few months, why bother? 

These comments could just be part of the adjustment phase, a symptom of cognitive decline or a sign of depression. Discuss any persistent negative behavior with their doctor, but do continue with the room makeover, even if it is done slowly to allow for adjustment. 

Here are some things you might want to add to the room of an elderly loved one: 

• Sturdy, comfortable bed that is easy to climb in and out of. (include a safety rail if needed) 

• Sturdy dressers or wardrobes that are easy to open. (avoid anything that involves climbing)

• Storage options that are easy to use, such as open bins or plastic carts with drawers

• Well-placed reading lamps (keep cords behind under furniture)

• A chair (not too low or too high. Avoid cushions that might slip off)

• Colors suited to their tastes and needs (bright colors for those who are depressed, soothing colors for those with agitation issues, contrasting colors for those with vision impairment)

• Monitor, bell or alarm to reduce fear of being alone 

• Smoke detector

• Night light

• Contrast tape to mark the edges of furnishings that blend too well with walls or curtains

Things you might want to avoid: 

• Loose rugs

• Free-standing floor fans or lamps that could fall over if grabbed for support

• Too many breakable items 

• Too many dust collectors (runners, scarves, throw pillows) 

• Complicated bedding sets (too many throw pillows, bolsters or ruffles that require fussing)

• Busy prints or patterns that could confuse or agitate someone with dementia.

• Too many mirrors 

• Top-heavy furniture

• Photos or paintings hung too low on the wall. (easy to bump and break)

• High-maintenance items or materials (leather, velvet, satin, silver, etc. 

Make it Fun!

Regardless of whether your loved one is for or against the idea of a new room makeover, you can help by being enthusiastic. By being excited about doing these special touches, you are showing your loved one that you are happy to have them in your home. 

That alone can help them settle in more than any verbal reassurance you can offer. 

5 Gifts You Shouldn't Take To Nursing Homes

credits posterize via freedigitalphotons.net

When people give gifts to the elderly, they aren't usually thinking about these hidden dangers.


Most people give gifts with the best of intentions. (excluding those are just doing it from obligation.) So they might say, while purchasing a gift:


"Oh, Dad would have loved this back in the day." or "This will let Mom do x task for herself."


While that is all well and good if the elderly still live at home and are completely independent, it might not be the best idea in a nursing home. 


First of all, if your loved one is in a home due to ANY decline in cognitive function, they may not be capable of using some items safely.


Secondly, there are other residents in there who might access these items, and cause themselves or others bodily harm. You might mean well. 


And yes, your elderly loved one may really like certain items. But it might still be better to avoid gifts like these:

Fall Fun For the Elderly

We are gearing up for the holiday season. Do you have any plans that include the elderly? Sure, Thanksgiving is the "family holiday" to which all relatives are invited. But why neglect other opportunities? 

Here are some ways to get the elderly involved in preparation for holidays, winter, and those long days of being trapped indoors. 

Have a Bad Weather Party

Having a big party before the first of the bad weather appears is a way to make some warm memories that comfort all the way through the dreary winter months. Plus, it is a celebration of fall, harvest, and the changing of the seasons. 

The perfect way to celebrate would be to have one last outdoor picnic or BBQ. Invite relatives and your loved one's friends. Get everyone together for laughs, music,  good food, and some party games. Remember to take lots of photos!

Plan the Holidays

Enlist your loved ones help with all the preparations for the holidays. Now is the time to start looking for fun and easy craft projects. 

• Take them shopping for supplies. 

• Plan menus together. 

• Revisit past holidays by telling stories and looking at photographs. 

Getting your elder involved in decorating and planning is an excellent and natural way to make them feel like a valued member of the family. Crafting sessions give them the opportunity to use their creative skills to impress others. 

And you will cherish those keepsakes. Trust me. 

Cleaning and Prep Party

You might not think that the words "cleaning" and "fun" should be in the same sentence. But if you invite some friends over, get your kids involved, and make a festival out of it, then you can turn your fall cleaning into one of the best days of the season. 


Not only does this help you get things done more quickly, it is pretty traditional, especially for people who lived in rural communities.  Your mother or grandmother may remember a time when neighborhood women got together to help each other prepare the inside of the home for winter,  while the men worked outside to make sure that supplies, crops, buildings, and animals were fit to last out the bad weather ahead. 


It can still be a comforting ritual, and you can customize it to fit your family and your lifestyle. For instance, you can arrange a frozen meal swap, a recipe jam, or a craft circle as part of the activities. 

Visit a Nursing Home

While your loved one is cocooned at home under your vigilant care, hundreds of seniors are confined to long-term care facilities. As the year winds down, they may be feeling lonely and depressed. 


Go cheer them up!


One of the many things you can do with your elderly loved one, your children, friends, neighbors and relatives is to build gift baskets or care packages for the elderly in nursing homes. 


Just a few dollar store items, a joyful greeting card and a smiling visitor can mean the world. This is also a great opportunity for children to learn about charity and the different types of aging care. 


If not a nursing home, then you can consider doing donations or care packages for the homeless or for persons who are homebound due to illness or disabilities. 

Take Advantage of Local Festivals

From the beginning of fall throughout the Christmas season, there are usually a number of small festivals that are fun to attend. These may include charming traditional entertainment such as square dances, hay rides, cook-offs, lighting ceremonies, local bands, charity drives, contests, animal shows, and plays. 

What About Men? 

If you are caregiving for a gentleman who has no interest in crafts or decorating, there are still activities to engage them. 


Besides festivals, there may be sporting events to see. Or they may be more interested in outdoor sporting such as hunting and fishing. If possible (and safe) arrange so they can spend a little time outdoors, either with yourself or a trusted friend. 


Many men that I know enjoy going to vehicle showrooms at this time of the year. This is when the sparkling new models are on display, and they can stand around and reminisce about the many changes that they have seen over the years. 


Check the movie listings and see if there is a new film hitting the theaters they might want to see. If they like more serious activities, such as chess, try to hook them up with a friend who can visit during the winter months for friendly competitions. 


Does your father or grandfather look a little bit like Father Christmas? Maybe he might enjoy playing Santa at nursing homes, senior centers, churches, or daycares. 

Have a Photography Session

Outdoor photos are always best in autumn. Colorful trees and sharp, blue skies make the perfect natural backdrop. So get your whole family together, go outside, and get some great photos for your mantel. 


While you are out there, have  a leaf fight. Laughter is the best medicine, and no one can throw leaves without laughing. 

Make Fall Fun So Winter Won't be Glum!

Autumn is one of my favorite times of the year, and I hate to think that others are not getting to enjoy it fully. Even if it just means a stroll (or drive) around the block to admire the leaves, fall can be a great season to share with your elderly loved one.

Medication Safety And The Elderly

credits taysm via morguefile.com

Too Much of A Good Thing: When Unmonitored Medications Can Be Dangerous for the Elderly

Growing older naturally comes with more aches and pains for most people. Being afraid of getting sick is a valid fear. For many elderly people, the worry that something might be wrong can be overwhelming. 

Sometimes this they might be trying to treat something that already exists with different types of remedies. But they could also be trying to prevent common issues "just in case". When its a "minor" issue they might think they can treat it themselves easier or "cheaper" . Or they may feel that is "so small" its not worth bothering their doctor. (Especially if they have a many medical conditions already being treated.) 

In these cases, seniors may turn to OTC medications, ointments and supplements. And while these things are safe enough if used correctly, what happens when they are being abused? Or when a certain medicine is not supposed to mix with a prescription medication they are already taking?

It can make your loved one sick. Or in some cases, it can even put them in danger. 

Taking too much medication, not enough, or the wrong kinds can have serious health implications. This is something my parents and myself witnessed first hand, and it was it a genuine struggle to correct it. 

Locking Down the Meds

My grandmother is not the elderly lady who refuses to take her medication. She loves to take pills. She also likes ointments, salves, OTC meds, tinctures, tonics and home remedies. When she moved in with my parents, she brought a whole home pharmacy with her.

She always felt awful.  We discussed it with her doctor, who, after an evaluation suggested that the medicine be removed from her room and safely locked away and supervised from there on out. 

When we started this process, we discovered outdated medications, prescriptions that belonged to other people (outdated, and mixed up in generic bottles) and all manner of ghastly and dangerous things. 

Although her dementia is in the early stage (meaning she still understands that some things go on the skin, and other things are to be swallowed) she was definitely showing a lack of understanding about the basic function of medications. We discovered that over the course of a day she was:

• Double or triple dosing on her prescription medications

• Taking numerous  laxatives per day

• Following the laxatives with anti-diarrheal medication

• Taking 5-10 acid reducers

• Applying  different lotions, alcohol, Listerine, Aspercreme, Vick's, Germ-x, triple-antibiotic ointment, heat rub, Witch hazel, peroxide, and vinegar. 

• Taking up to 7 aspirin a day

• Taking 4-7 Excedrin per day

• Taking several different vitamins supplements including multi-vitamins, creating double or triple doses of some elements.

• Taking herbal supplements incorrectly

Needless to say, this meant she was poisoning herself on a daily basis. She was exhausted, weak, and could barely eat without suffering indigestion.

Weaning her from the excess medications was very stressful for everyone. Physically, she had only a positive reaction.  Her health improved by leaps and bounds almost immediately. Emotionally, though...she was a wreck. She cried, she screamed, she threatened. 

For the first few weeks she was terrified that she was dying without these extra meds. (Please note that all of this was done under a doctors supervision, with all the meds documented. Her prescriptions were also put in a safe place and were given as prescribed on the clock.) She would ask for her pulse to be checked, she would list numerous things she could "feel" wrong with herself. 

Alarmed by this, we spoke to her doctor. He assured us that none of the OTC meds she had were addictive, however the mental dependency on the idea of taking them. And some had created a dependency, (laxatives) that required more care.  He emphasized the importance of keeping the medicines monitored. 

During this time she was both very afraid that she was going to have health problems from not treating things in advance (such as with the laxatives), and at the same time resentful that she had to lose the independence to handle her medicines herself. (This is understandable, and is also an issue with seniors who refuse to take their medications.) 

Along with the guidance of the doctors, we eased her through this time, understanding that the dementia was making it difficult or impossible for her to understand the self harm she was causing. 

Medication Safety Tips: 

1.  Watch Carefully :  See what is being taken, how often, and why. Familiarize yourself with the prescriptions, including the dosages and any warnings. 

2. Make a Cheat Sheet:  Write down current medications and anything that is OTC that is being frequently used. Also when and how meds should be taken (in the morning? With a meal?) so its easier to follow the plan at a glance than having to look at the bottles every time. 

3. Ask the Doctor: If you are worried they might be taking too many OTC medications, or taking them incorrectly, tell their doctor and ask for their advice. If they developed a dependency, they may have to be weaned off gently over time. 

4. Invest in a Locking Cabinet: If it gets to the point where you absolutely have to monitor and hand out medications yourself, then its probably safest to lock the medications up. Sometimes you may only need a pill box with the daily cubes. It can be enough to keep your loved one safe. However you may still  have to lock more risky OTC items away. (like laxatives, cold medicines, Benadryl, etc.)

5. Be Patient: and keep reassuring your loved one you aren't punishing them, and you aren't trying to harm them. They may not understand, or they may choose not to believe you. Its okay to discuss reactions and behaviors with the health care team. They will help guide you as you help your loved one. 

6. Everyone's Medications: If it reaches a point where your loved one is overmedicating themselves and need supervision, then all the meds in your house will have to be kept secure, especially if your loved one has dementia.

Be Responsible With Medication

The elderly often have difficulty with their medication. They may not be able to read the labels, they may not understand how they are supposed to take certain pills. They sometimes don't understand the danger of OTC medications, especially in combinations. 

Whereas the majority of caregivers have issues with their loved ones refusing pills or simply forgetting to take them; it is still important to monitor ALL medications in the house. It can certainly go the other way. 

Luckily, we were able to stop the abuse before it did irreversible damage. There were some  side-effects though. The use of so many topical creams had led to some skin infections, some that caused scarring. Digestive issues were the longest to heal, and her liver health had to be monitored.

It has taken a full year to reverse the damage to her digestive system. But she is finally able to eat without having major gastro-intestinal upset. Thus, she is better able to absorb her vitamin supplements.

 After her body had time to heal, her doctor said that she could have certain things to use daily, such as Vicks and lotion. Thus, she still feels as though she is "doctoring" herself, but these items are harmless in small quantities, since they aren't being mixed with so many other chemicals. 

Talk you your care provider about any medication issues your loved one may have. Never assume they are treating themselves responsibly, especially of they are suffering from dementia or Alzheimer's. 

Rollator Review--A Great Investment For The Elderly

Mobility walkers are a blessing to the elderly and their caregivers.

                                   



When my grandmother came to live with us, she had lost the better part of her vision. Her former family caregivers had neglected her care so much that she was very weak. She had bad stomach aches and dizzy spells.

She had also been housebound for a long time, and wanted nothing more than to be able to go shopping again. Only her physical health wouldn't allow for extended shopping trips.

As soon as we found her a new doctor, she was given a prescription for a Rollator. At first, she stubbornly refused to use it. Her old lift-and-step walker was good enough, she claimed. Soon, she came to love the Rollator, and so do we!


What Is A Rollator?


A Rollator is a mobility aid. Rollator is actually a brand-name. Many companies make similar products, called mobility walkers.


The difference between mobility walkers and standard walkers are the ease of use. Rollators and similar products have wheels, a seat, and hand-brakes. They sometimes have a storage basket attached or under the seat.


Because the wheels keep the elderly person from having to lift the walker with each step, it makes mobility faster. The seat provides a place to rest. The basket is great for stashing a purse or a few small shopping bags.

How Well Do Rollators Work?

I first saw a Rollator in use at the nursing home. One of my ladies zipped about with her "scooter", as she called it. She never needed a chair. She carried her knitting supplies in the little basket. Her family had personalized hers with a cupholder and decorative stickers. She had made herself a little cushion for the seat. (I know, totally cute, huh? I loved it.)


Impressed, I recommended that my grandmother ask her doctor about one. After she agreed to use it, the change in her personality was incredible. Before, she had been afraid to walk outside or in large crowded areas. Now she had not only a device that would support her, but a place to rest whenever she needed.


Now, the Rollator goes with us everywhere. No more having to search for public benches. No worrying about germs. After her physical health improved from better care and she regained her strength, she was ready and confident to face the world again with her Rollator.


What does she love about it? She loves that she can hide her purse in the seat and sit on it. She doesn't have to worry about losing her purse, and she is pretty sure she would notice if someone was trying to snatch it. This is important for many elderly, especially those with dementia or vision problems who worry about the safety of their personal possession.


Considerations


I highly recommend that all caregivers consider a Rollator or similar mobility walker if they have an elderly relative that is mobile but somewhat limited. Still, a physician should be consulted to make sure a Rollator is the safest device for your loved one. A rolling mobility aid may not be safe enough for someone who cannot understand how to use the hand brakes.


Mobility walkers are portable. Some models are slimmer than others and will fold down to fit in even a small car. My grandmother has a large model and it is lightweight enough that she can carry it folded. It fits into a compact car without any problems.


Where size is an issue is in the home. If the Rollator will be used all the time, not just for outdoors, then you will need to decide which size will maneuver around the house with the most ease.


Mobility devices should be used with proper footwear to prevent falls. They should also be inspected regularly to ensure that all the screws and bolts are tight and that the brake lines are still in good shape. Test the brakes frequently.


A Mobility Device Can Provide A Sense of Independence


Give your loved one the gift of confidence and independence. Talk to their physician about a Rollator or other mobility walker. These devices are a blessing to many elderly who seek security and freedom.

Dementia--Making The Best Of The Good Days

Dealing with dementia every day can be exasperating! How many times as a caregiver, friend or relative have you thrown up your hands in surrender when yet another simple issue becomes a battle? It is okay to admit it...we all feel that way sometimes.      
        

For most caregivers, the middle stages of dementia are the most difficult. During the early stages, a person with dementia is still capable of functioning somewhat normally, albeit with some memory lapses, or confusion.


In later stages, the dementia takes over completely, and the person becomes a highly dependent stranger, who can no longer function without assistance. Still, the middle stages can be the most frustrating. Here, the person with dementia still has moments of lucidity. They may still be physically able to walk, wander, or rummage. Unlike earlier and later stages, the middle stage shows the most fluctuation in personality--with behavior changes from hour to hour, such as:

• Aggression
• Depression
• Refusing meals
• Threats
• Accusations
• Confusion
• Paranoia

To make it more complicated, one day you will wake up and find that the person with dementia is perfectly lucid, in a great mood, and wants to do something. Yet only the day before they were angry and certain that you were "stealing" from them.

Use Good Dementia Days To Your Advantage

While it may be tempting to choose this day to have a friend come over and elderly-sit so that you can get out, it is really much better if you take this day to do something meaningful with the your loved one. Otherwise, you are ONLY going to see the bad days, and that can lead to caregiver burnout...fast.


So, what is the best way to spend the day? If there isn't anything of a pressing or urgent nature (such as a doctor's appointment), ask your loved one what he or she would like to do. If it is warm weather, consider a walk around the yard, a park, or the block.


This is also a good day to go shopping. Treat both of you to a new trinket or pleasantry. This can reinforce good behaviors and can possibly provide a keepsake for the occasion. If your loved one isn't physically or emotionally up for an outing, how about just having a nice conversation over a favorite lunch?

Ideas For Outings 

Depending on the stage of dementia, and how well your loved one copes with strangers or crowds, you may have several options for a day out. Try visiting public places on weekdays when there will be fewer crowds. Always keep the comfort and safety of a person with dementia in mind.


Make sure they are wearing identification in case they become lost. If taking a walk in nature, be sure to take a phone, any medication that must be taken at a certain time, a snack, water, and a small first aid kit. Here are some places that you can go:

• The mall

• A park

• Antique malls and thrift stores

• Local festivals and craft shows

• Open air concerts

• Zoos and aquariums

• Museums

• Nature hikes and guided nature tours

• Picnic in the yard or garden

Inside Activities

Take advantage of a day when the dementia seems to be asleep. But don't use it to catch up on chores or paperwork. Instead, enjoy the all-to-seldom return of your loved one while it lasts. If they don't feel like going out, or if the weather is bad, you can still have a pleasant time in the house.

• Watch some classic movies or family home videos together.

• Get out the photo albums and tell funny stories

• Mock interview your loved one about a time in his or her past

• Mix up some DIY spa recipes in your kitchen

• Mix up some edible treats together

• Enlist their help with some holiday crafting

• Sketch out plans for a  flower garden 

• Hunt for a fun tutorial and learn something new together

• Put on some music and dance

• Read a book out loud

• Pull out some cards or board games

These are just a few suggestions. Don't stereotype your loved one though. Dementia will sometimes alter their likes and dislikes. They may prefer to do things they never enjoyed before, and avoid activities they once loved.


Don't force them to be their "old selves". Embrace their new, spontaneous likes, and spend the good dementia days building up new memories.